I want to talk to her about what's deep in her soul
Her worries and her wishes
But we talk about work and shopping so that we can maintain pleasantness
I want to tell her the depth of the story that led to her creation
As I look into her eyes
The same eyes as her father
And the words change as they pass my lips
He loved you.
Know that, my darling daughter.
His intention was to give you the best life he could.
He couldn't be the dad you deserved.
His broken brain told him it was best for you if he died.
I saw the moment it changed you.
I have witnessed a few moments in your life that changed who you are.
As you grow away from me
I don't get to be your witness anymore
And everytime I see you
And talk to you
I want to learn your stories
To learn who you are now
I wonder if my mother feels this way
We are so different in our values
And so alike in our habits
She says things
I wouldn't be friends with people who say these things
It is a complicated love
Between mother and daughter
It pains me to think of my daughter feeling that way about me
And so we speak of pleasant things
And I wonder how many generations have done this delicate dance